The Talented Mr. Wonderful: Fuck, That’s Delicious (Episode 6)

COPENHAGEN, DENMARK] We out here in front of Noma, Copenhagen. Fucking stoned out of my mind, with 46,000 courses. Look at this scene. This is Nordic beauty. Life is good. Here with my brothers man. Got Big Body with me. [ACTION BRONSON] I got Stacks with me, I got Mayhem Lauren with me. Whoever thought that making words rhyme would get this. [FUCK THAT’S DELICIOUS]
This time on Fuck That’s Delicious… I’ve once again managed to dine at the most unbelievable establishments possible. I’m everywhere from Noma in Copenhagen, to Wieners Circle in Chicago. [BIG BODY BES, HALAL AFICIONADO]
I got my brother Big Body. My man right here. That is… Street Fighter Two. I got my brother Mayhem Lauren with me. We’ve known each other since we were three. We went from Denmark to Chicago, to Venice. Eating all types of all kinds of everything; we’re just wil’ing in the streets. Fuck that’s delicious. [VENICE, ITALY] [MEYHEM LAUREN, RAPPER]
We’re in Venice Only involved in aquatic movements. We’re in Italy. You see us on the boats in the canals. Look at the wonderful architecture, the city built in water. I never thought I’d see this in my life, but we here. Crazy. Now we’re in the Rio de la Frescada. We’re about to go eat some fish, some pasta. [OSTERIA DEL CASON
VENICE, ITALY] Been a good trip my brother. This is Venetian style shrimps, fried with vinegar. My mother used to put shrimp in my baby bottle; if anybody knows shrimp, I know shrimp. This is high quality shrimp right here. Whoa. -He is obsessed with you. He’s obsessed.
-Such a big fan. Oh thank you man I appreciate that. -I really don’t want to ruin your dinner, but…
-Oh you’re not ruining anything. That made our dinner better, thank you. Cuddle fish. I’m interested in this sea truffle right here. Look at this beautiful flesh right here. Beautiful. This is a very nice gesture right here. What I’ve been waiting for my entire trip. This is the simplest you can get, pasta al dente. If you cook your pasta to mush, I hate you. I could live here. I think. I couldn’t even live in the fucking Bronx; I’m thinking about living in Venice or… I can’t leave Queens. I’m in another place right now; I’m in a beautiful mind frame. Straight up, I’m fucking I’m touched on some real shit. Go around the world, perform for people, you’re able to see the most incredible places while still working and getting paid. I really couldn’t think of a better job. [AMASS
One of Copenhagen’s most talented chefs, invited me to his restaurant for a barbecue before the show, and honestly, I couldn’t see how I could turn this down. On the water, overlooking the gorgeous garden. [MATT ORLANDO, CHEF/OWNER, AMASS]
In Denmark it’s super hard to get fatty brisket. Really? -It’s like a cut no butcher knows. Yeah.
-Really. I’ve got some dried beef fat in there, melted down. Let me get my cologne. This is what I want to smell like. Shall I close it for you or leave it? Yeah you can close it. We’re at Matt’s spot right now, Amass. Before he opened this place, he used to work at the Fat Duck in England, Per Se in New York, and Noma here in Copenhagen. Look at this kitchen. Come on, your mother don’t got a kitchen like this. That’s the piece, that’s the money shot. Oh my god. Look at this fucking perfect cornbread man, are you kidding me. This is beautiful. Fuck off. Cooked a brisket for 30 hours, loads of tomatoes, fresh berries, potato salad and fried egg whites. This might be the perfect plate. It feels like I’m eating Starburst. Cherry sherbert, olive oil, and burnt chocolate. You gotta get a little bit of everything. That’s like a next level Cherry Garcia. Honey butter, a touch of salt, on a baked chocolate chip salted cookie. Yup. Next universe. Holy shit. Yo Body, did you rehearse? I’m rehearsing right now. Young rehearsals. I don’t even know what’s on the grill, but I’m waiting for it. I want my seconds, first. I’ve been to Copenhagen before, several times, it’s been one of my favorite cities in the world. Every place in Europe has some sort of Arabic person that has the kebab spot, and they’re the only place that stays open all night. The reason why we eat so much shawarma, because he doesn’t like anything else but Islamically prepared animals. This is true, because every time you eat a halal meal, they clean the sins of the day. You throw all that shit up in the morning, your shits are hot, it’s crazy. You know what time it is? Big Body… This is how you work off that fucking cookie with honey butter on it and salt. One of the best meals I’ve ever had is a place in the back of a shitty heavy metal bar in Copenhagen. Chef Lee Tiernan, thank you. [LEE TIERNAN, CHEF]
Hi, my name’s Lee Tiernan. And we’re here at Bachan night club, in Copenhagen. Six weeks ago I started doing the food here; just for the summer. Tonight I’m prepping, but I just so happen to have some stuff in the smoker, and about to cook a nice lamb shoulder for Action Bronson. How ya doin’ mate? Good to see ya. Alright, yeah I’m good. -What’s up
-Good to see you mate, you alright? -What’s goin on mate, Diego. Have 36 different names. Just doin what I do man. However the breeze takes me. Is that beer? No, it’s South American iced tea. No alcohol. A lotta caffeine… Ok. I’m with that organic lifestyle. I make all the bread myself. There’s smoked potato and smoked artichoke in here as well. [TOM ADAMS, CHEF] That’s the smoked lamb shoulder. Thank you sir. I’m gonna fry some of that up for ya. You see this? Lamb shoulder. I like a nice man tricep. Thank you sir. That’s the smoked lamb shoulder with red peppers and aubergine. Sumac onions. Some pickled red cabbage. Getting Turkish with is huh? Yeah, a little bit. Thank you for doing this man. And lamb’s tongues. With a bit of pomegranate molasses on them. About to make out with that lamb tongue. I’m used to Dominican and Puerto Rican tongue, but you know.. Yo, this is ridiculous. It’s fucking incredible. This lamb stew right here, the lamb shoulder, is the best thing I’ve had so far on this fucking trip. You hear me? This reminds me of my grandmothers kissing my cheek. I’m gonna have to agree and say this is the best thing all trip. Feel like I’m in the middle of like a Middle Eastern knife fight. The lamb was a little retarded when you did it, this shit is stupid. Let me stick this down; it’s smoked pork jowl, XO sauce and pickled daikon. I think you’re gonna enjoy that. Went to a lot of fucking fancy places we’re in the back of a fucking night club right now. We got graffiti all over the wall, in one of the bathroom someone shit on the floor. But it doesn’t matter, because the food here is the best food I’ve had all year long. This shit is incredible to me. Chef’s you’ve outdone yourselves. I don’t even know what to say. Chef Lee Tiernan is doing his fucking thing over there. I think he took some fucking ecstasy before making this. And I don’t blame him if he did, tell you the truth. He knew he was coming, fucking dealing with some wild fucks. Chefs. This is literally the best I’ve ever been treated, culinarily. I’ve never been treated better than here. [JOHN MICHAEL JENSEN, CHEF/OWNER, JOHN’S HOTDOG DELI]
Hi, I’m John, you’re right in front of my little kitchen. -Look at this little guy.
-It’s a mother fucking pro. He’s a pro. My hotdog stand is right in front of central station. I’m open every second week, from Tuesday to Monday, from 10 o’clock in the morning to 1 o’clock at night. All of the rest of the hotdog stands sell some shit. I want to make good stuff. I don’t care if I make less money, I got more happy customers. -Good product, that’s what it’s all about.
-Yeah. -This is where all the magic happens, his food lab.
-Hotdog food lab. Take all these creations and bring them to the streets for the people. This is not just some fucking dick in water. You know what I mean? This is fucking gourmet, delicious stuff. It’s beef, pork? Everything’s pork, huh. You like chili sauce? Yeah, I like everything man. This is sour with blueberry, add a little chili. That mustard with the beer, fuck man. No. No! No! Can I order some sausages? Or are we too tired from jet lag? So we’re in the fucking Windy City of Chicago. Hot Doug’s is a cuisine all in itself. Call them hotdogs, sausages, will not do it justice. Each dog is specifically hand crafted, just like a snowflake. Just like pussy. We got into town three weeks [DOUG SOHN, RETIRED HOT DOG MAGNATE]
before Doug was going to close down. And the lines took fucking four hours. I had nightmares I was going to miss my opportunity, but we ended up ordering the entire menu. Bottom line is I’m gonna taste every single one of these Let’s speak on these fries though, what kind of fries are these? Oh we got the duck fat fries on this. That’s a next level crunch. The crunch on these duck fat fries man. Incredible. So this is the guanciale and the escargot, snail. And the fucking mouth of a pig, the jowl. Oh man, with a young cheese. Oh my god. The earthiness from the mother fucking snails, the fattiness from the jowl… that creaminess and that fatty shit from the young brie; I want to eat this entire thing, but I have 14 more to go, so we’re gonna put this one on hold. We’re gonna try the polish now. I eat peppers like that with every meal. The quality in this shit is ridiculous man. Cassoulet is one of my favorite things. With the duck sausage and the duck confit… the white beans, oh my god. This is fucking Donald in a bun. We got make this one totally next level. -Gonna take some duck fat fries.
-Duck fat. This fucking dude is a master mind. Everything duck! Same. That duck confit, the fat from the duck… oh my god. Vois. That’s illegal in 38 states. That’s the same charge as crack. Yo, this is a felony fucking piece of food. You have to fucking try this. I’m only trying duck related dogs in this episode. My man is only eating fucking duck from now on, you understand? Like 16 flavors going on right now. My little tastebuds are doing backflips right now, this is incredible. There’s levels of this duck shit man. Come back. This might be the single most decadent, delicious thing I’ve had in my life. I nutted. In my pants, I have to go change. Doug, you’re a genius. You should have your penis cleaned by three African princesses every day. I just want to say, Action, you’re the bomb diggity. That’s what the kids say, right? Thank you boss. [MIKE DITKA, COACH]
-Thank you coach, I appreciate it.
-You’re welcome. -Thank you, thank you. You bet, thank you.
-Have a nice weekend, huh. Hey, how are you? Go ahead. Thank you for having me. Diana, nice to see you. [DIANA DITKA, WIFE]
-How are you?
-You’re like Duck Dynasty. Now what is this for? You got a food show? Yeah. We have a food show in Vice. It’s, Vice is a big media network, and uh, I’m sure they already told you the name, whatever. Yeah, me, I’m, I used to be a chef. I hurt myself in the kitchen, I broke my leg, and I just somehow you know became a rapper. I got a singer here, but he doesn’t do rap, he does Sinatra. I love Sinatra too. That’s my grandfather’s music. Oh man, look at this. You can pick it up, you’re a good man Yup. Go. Good piece of meat. And here is what we call pot roast nachos. -Oysters.
-Oh man. This is the paddle steak. And the pork chop. -Nice.
-Some lobster mac n’cheese. That’s great stuff. Do you eat like this every night? No. Oh, you are a stud. -Yeah, good to see you, I wouldn’t say that though.
-God bless, thank you. -What you’ve done for this city’s been awesome.
-Thank you. You’re nobody in Chicago, when you’re sitting next to Coach. You come to New York, I’ll take you out. Coach, I have a bachelorette. This is her bachelorette party. -How are you?
-Hi. -It’s really nice to meet you. Thank you sir.
-Congratulations. Do you mind taking a photo with them? [RIFF RAFF, NEON ICON]
-We have 100 dollars.
– 100 dollars worth of wiener schnitzel. We’re gonna go to Wieners Circle, we’re gonna get $100 worth. The Wieners Circle is the recipient of the 1994 Latoya Jackson Foundation award [POOCHIE JACKSON, SERVICE TEAM LEADER]
for the most outstanding service in the greater Mid West Area. Who the rapper? That guy right there, I don’t know. Get this mother fucker outta here. This mother fucker with his goatee on his cheek. Who’s this mo fo? -Are you the DJ?
-Nah. What you do? Just hang. Oh shit, I’m gonna come hang with you. -Looking like Duck Dynasty and shit.
-Ah Duck Dynasty. DJ Duck. I’ll suck your dick so hard from the back, you gonna fart. From the back mother fucker! From the bizack. We eating one of everything. -He said one of everything.
-Yeah, one of everything. Give me a thousand dollars. A thousand? Yeah, you got it mother fucker, I seen that ugly ass blue jean suit you wore on the VMAs. With that thin bitch you had with ya. That was Versace though. I don’t give a fuck what it was mo fo, it was ugly. Nah, I’m just playin’. -I want it like this.
-She a groupie.Oh my god.You all in my biz. Don’t worry about it I ate my food here If I ate that shit on the moon it didn’t mean shit. Long as I paid for that shit and you keep something in your pocket -Fuck outta here!
-Get the fuck outta here, don’t come here! That flat booty ass. Hey Riff! Let’s go baby. Come on, get this food. Extra pussy juice on it just for you. -This the famous cheddar burger.
-Alright. This the turkey burger. This your shit, no sauce. Appreciate it. That’s the Vienna Red Hot, that’s the charred cheddar dog, that’s the Colby cheese burger. That’s the veggie burger, you said everything off the menu. Yeah I did. This is for that nappy haired mother fucker over there. [DADDY YANKEE]
How’s the dog? Drop it like it’s hot. That’s right baby, bitch gotta pay for a pap smear. Take it all. You know what Riff Raff,
-Take all my shit. you let something happen to my pussy here, all because your ass wanna be cheap. On you. For sure. For sure that’s on you. Let’s go. Ready? They weren’t ready for the chocolate shake. They ain’t ready. [VENICE, ITALY] [MIKE, GONDOLIER/RAPPER] Spit something.What do you want?When I used to throw away my socks she didn’t go buy them she had callus on her hands locked home darning my socks.Watch your head dog!My closest brothers knew all the shit I went through I’m respected ’cause I’m real never told bullshit been beat up, I beat them up too Hell yeah!Crazy. My team wavy, New York raised meI used to keep the box cutters in the cream AV, now we in the greencounting cream spinach, million dollar smile, gotta keep a clean imageI’m a gentleman, but ain’t nothing gentle about me,have you set up on your block by some bitches that mouth meBitch pussy smells like Sway’s hatAmore! Amore! I’d like to smoke a joint. This is for you. Hola! My man Mike. Blessed up with this. So peaceful. This is the most peaceful I’ve been in months. You see that? Fuck That’s Delicious. Enjoy. Rap does a lot of wonderful things. [NEXT ON
FUCK THAT’S DELICIOUS] What’s up Action? What you doin’ buddy? -Where you gotta go bro?
-Gonna go pick up my man Body, but I wanna get some Chinese fucking halal. You know what I mean? Didn’t you say you want to be on Love and Hip Hop? This is fucking nothing compared to that. Let’s go shoot some hoops man. Money. This is nuts. It’s like it’s all New York. The moment when Trick Daddy and Trina comes on, you eat chicken parm. Sitting on fucking Amsterdam right now, with 43 fucking dimes That’s that uptown dream right here. Curtain goes up, and can be one on one, just you and her. I start pumping, and when I start pumping it gets big. She says ‘it’s a tricky dick.’ [A MUNCHIES PRODUCTION]

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